


random commentfic from Tumblr

by NellieOleson



Category: Stargate SG-1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 16:36:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14698122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NellieOleson/pseuds/NellieOleson
Summary: commentfic from Tumblr that is random.





	random commentfic from Tumblr

**Author's Note:**

> trying to keep all the garbage fic in one place.

#1) This was for the photoset of that phone call from Citizen Joe where Sam is calling Jack on the red phone like it's just something they do now. 

 

The crazy man showing up in Jack’s kitchen is a relief.

Carter’s been a lot more—friendly is the only way he can think of to describe it—since Pete crashed onto the scene. 

She’d been nervous around Jack in the beginning. A little in awe probably. Her military background would have almost guaranteed that. She’d gotten comfortable with him as a commanding officer over time, and working with her was one of the few bright spots in Jack’s career. Everything else had grown layered and complicated, and somewhere along the line they’d skipped right over friendship and landed in the profoundly unsatisfying space between coworkers and everything.

He’s not sure if this new phase is a step forward or a step back. It’s not something he can afford to examine too closely, but she calls him out of the blue now and they chat like normal people. She stands too close to him at work like he’s Daniel or Teal’c, and she smiles at him like she means it, without the regret and sadness lurking just under her skin.

He likes this new relationship they have, craves it in a way that he shouldn’t, but it also hurts him to his core because they’re good at this. They’re better at it than he ever would have imagined, and all he can think about is how he could have had everything with her. And those thoughts are not safe. 

Thinking like that will undo him.

And that’s how he finds himself relieved when a man shows up in his kitchen to distract him from his phone. Because a stranger with a gun was way less dangerous than chatting with Carter about weekend plans and breakfast. 

 

 

#2) This was because someone wanted an AU where everything was the same except Jack had the MacGuyver mullet. I don't know.

 

Mullet hair:

Previously, on Stargate SG-1...

O'NEILL  
Permission to take a team through the Stargate, sir?  
HAMMOND  
Assuming I get the President's authorization. The mission briefing will be at 0800 hours. Consider yourself recalled to active duty, Colonel.  
O’NEILL  
Yeah, about that. I have some… conditions.

 

*************  
And now…  
*************

“Hey, Daniel.” Sam trotted toward the elevators, trying to catch Daniel before he disappeared for the day. She wasn’t sure she could wait any longer. 

Daniel stuck his foot in the doors and looked surprised to see another human being. “Why are you still here?” he asked.

Sam liked that about Daniel. The way he just said what was on his mind. She thought they’d work well together. It would be nice having another scientist around.

“I had some simulations running.” She didn’t bother going into any more detail. She had other, less important but possibly more intriguing issues to discuss. She didn’t have a good way to get what she wanted out of a normal conversation. Steering it awkwardly in the direction she wanted was her only choice. 

“So,” she said. “You know Colonel O’Neill better than, well, all of us probably.” 

“I guess I do. Why?”

Sam wondered if she should ask. It was really grating on her sense of rule-following, but she didn’t want it to get back to Colonel O’Neill. Everyone else seemed to just accept it. Like it was normal. “What’s up with his…” She waved her hand around the back of her collar. It was difficult to find words to describe it. “You know.”

“His hair?”

“Yeah. It’s not exactly regulation.” Not even close. Her own hair flirted with the edge of her collar on occasion, but nothing like his. 

“I—” Daniel stopped to push the button for his floor and the doors slid shut. “I actually have no idea. It wasn’t like that the last time I saw him.”

“Really?” That was a surprise. Her working theory was that it was part of some obscure religious belief. 

 

“Yeah,” said Daniel, like he was only now considering the subject for the first time. “His hair was a lot more… military, I guess. You know, flat. And short.” He passed his hand over the top of his head to demonstrate..

“Well, that’s—” It was odd, was what it was. “Interesting,” was what she said.

“I guess,” said Daniel. He seemed done with talking about Colonel O’Neill’s hair. Maybe as a civilian, he just wasn’t concerned with things like that. “Maybe you should ask him.”

“Maybe,” said Sam even though there was no way in hell she was ever going to do any such thing.

Her resolve lasted less than twenty-four hours. She followed him out of the locker room the next morning and he had to fish his hair out from under his collar after putting his BDU top on. Sam made more of a disapproving noise than she’d intended and he turned around to look at her.

“What is it, Captain?”

“It’s just-” He looked tall and imposing and she didn’t really know him well enough to make this a good idea. “Nevermind,” she said.

She couldn’t stop herself from looking at his hair, fanned out perfectly on both sides of his neck. How did he even do that?

“It’s my hair, isn’t it?”

Sam was honest to a fault and she couldn’t bring herself to deny that. She did the next best thing by not confirming it.

“Look,” he said. “It’s no big deal. I’m surprised it took you this long to bring it up.”

“But— Well. Why?”

“Wow, Carter. That’s the most incoherent thing I’ve ever heard you say.” He looked around, making sure the hall was still clear before lowering his voice and saying, “To be honest, I don’t even like it.”

“I don’t understand anything about this, sir.” 

He tried harder to explain, like there was anything he could say to justify the disaster hanging off the back of his head. “I just wanted to see if they’d let me keep it,” he said. “I was retired. I liked being retired. I felt like they owed me something.”

“And you picked that?”

Colonel O’Neill just shrugged and Sam felt just a little bit sorry for him. “It seemed like a good idea at the time,” he said. 

 

 

#3) Uh. This one just says: Teal’c: Motherfucker. I wish I could remember the exact prompt for this. 

 

“Someone needs to have a talk with him.”

Sam and Jack both turned to look at him like he was that someone. 

Daniel cleared his throat, because, yeah, maybe this was all his fault. Maybe. It was possible Teal’c would have discovered Samuel L Jackson on his own. 

“These false gods are lying motherfuckers,” Teal’c bellowed. The small gathering of Jaffa shifted nervously, worried that they would be struck down just from hearing those words. “I have seen with my own eyes. They are nothing but motherfucking parasites.”

Jack shook his head and glared at Daniel. Sam was trying not to laugh. Daniel ignored them both. It wasn’t like the Jaffa had any context for the words.

Teal’c continued. “It is time, my brothers. Time for the Jaffa to rise up against these motherfucking Goau’ld. Time to end the slaughter of our kind to serve their motherfucking war.” 

Teal’c really knew how to deliver a speech. Daniel watched the crowd closely, trying to decide how many were open to joining the rebellion. There were a few stragglers at the edge, looking angry and unconvinced, but most seemed interested in what Teal’c was saying. Maybe they didn’t believe yet, but they wanted to.

Teal’c joined them after leaving the crowd to consider his words, to decide if joining the rebellion was worth the risk.

Jack put his hand on Teal’c’s shoulder and gave Daniel a pointed look. “Great speech, Teal’c.”

“Yeah,” added Sam. “It was very… colorful.”

Daniel laughed. Maybe they had a point. He’d talk to Teal’c when they got back to the SGC. For now, though, he’d let him enjoy the moment. “I think all but a few will probably turn on the Goa’uld, Teal’c. This is a good day for the rebellion.”

Teal’c looked pleased with himself as he nodded in Daniel’s direction. “Indeed, motherfuckers,” he said quietly. “Indeed.”

 

#4) For that wedding picture from 200 I guess.

 

It’s a good picture. 

It’s the one she keeps on her desk when she has a desk. She looks a little self-conscious. It’s the same look she has whenever she gets promoted. 

Jack, as always, looks like he’s trying not to say something inappropriate. He looks good, though, cleaned up and dapper.

Her favorite thing is his hair. You can tell he tried. It’s parted and combed like a real adult would do. 

But Jack’s hair is not easily tamed, and one rogue fluff is sticking up in back. She likes that little flag of rebellious hair. 

It suits him. 

 

#5) This one just says: 'Stalker Pete' I think Bethany was involved.

 

The sun was low on the horizon, painting the pond in rich golds and deep shadows. Sam pulled her feet from the water and slid carefully back from the edge. It was past time to go in and relinquish the outdoors to the frogs and mosquitoes, but they were all reluctant to close the door on the moment. It felt like an ending. Something final that they’d never be able to go back to. 

Jack was still in his lawn chair, swapping ‘worst goa’uld cell ever’ stories with Teal’c. She sat next to his crossed ankles, and he tipped his feet so they were resting against her thigh. She wanted to reach down and wrap her hand around his leg--to run her fingers up his calf, but Daniel was sitting on her other side, cross-legged like a kindergartner. She wasn’t ready to take that plunge with this much of an audience.

“I can’t believe Pete stalked you,” said Daniel. It was a comment Sam hadn’t been expecting after such a long stretch of silence. They’d already had this conversation, but Daniel had a lot to say about Pete. Teal’c too, in his own way. Jack was the only one who’d kept his thoughts to himself. She could imagine how he’d felt though, watching her try to have a life she thought she was supposed to want. Just thinking about it made her want to touch him again. To reassure him. To apologize.

“I can’t believe I was going to marry him.” Because now, looking back, it seemed like the worst idea she’d ever had. 

Jack tapped her with his foot. She looked down at it, watching his toes because they were oddly fascinating after a few beers and an entire day spent with a side of Jack she rarely got the chance to see. A side she hoped to get to know a lot better. 

“You were never going to marry that guy, Carter.”

“I wasn’t?” It seemed obvious in retrospect. But how had he known when she’d been plowing headfirst to the altar? She cringed a little thinking about it. She’d been so oblivious. 

“Nope,” he said.

She turned so she could see him better. He was looking at her in a way that brought heat to her cheeks. She couldn’t look away and wondered how she ever had. 

Daniel cleared his throat when they just kept staring at each other like the rest of the world had disappeared around them. “I think I’m going to go back inside.”

Teal’c stood up and did his best not to look like he was only leaving so she could be alone with Jack. “I shall accompany you, Daniel Jackson.” 

Daniel gave her shoulder an encouraging squeeze once he was on his feet, and Sam tried not to feel self conscious about his subtle cheerleading. One day, she’d ask Daniel how long he’d been expecting this outcome. If the alternate realities had affected his perception of their relationship. It was a question she hadn’t yet been able to answer for herself.

They were quiet for a long time after Daniel and Teal’c left, watching the sun melt into the treeline until there was nothing left but a faint glow on the horizon. 

“How did you know?”

He’d shifted his chair so he he could put one leg on either side of her and she leaned against his knee. “Know what?” he asked. 

“That-” She stopped, not really sure why she was dwelling on the subject. “That I wasn’t going to marry Pete.” Because he’d been nothing but quietly supportive while she was going through the motions. “You never said anything.” And she’d so desperately wanted him to even though she knew he couldn’t. 

“Didn’t need to.” His voice was low, weighted down with emotion. He climbed down from his chair to sit behind her, and she leaned back against his chest. Her long-decaying orbit around him finally coming to an end. It felt like home. Like stepping back onto the gate ramp after a long, shitty mission.

Sam thought about his faith in her, wondering if he was right-- if the house and the dog and the stalking would have been enough to open her eyes. Or if listening to her father question her life choices while he died had been a necessary catalyst. Her mind was a bristling hive of what-ifs next to Jack’s easy confidence. He rested his chin on her shoulder and she felt the heat from his body sinking into her back. Would it always be like this? This feeling when she was near him? She wasn’t sure she could survive it. 

“What are you thinking about?”

“You,” she admitted. “Us.” She was thinking maybe he was right. Maybe there was no way she could have passed up the possibility of this. That somehow they’d have ended up here despite her best efforts. “And wormhole physics,” she added.

“Me too.”

“You’re thinking about wormhole physics?” He ran his hand up her arm and she shivered even though the night was warm. He’d never touched her like that and she didn’t want him to stop. Ever. She turned and faced him. Nervous about what would come next for them, but wanting it more than she’d ever wanted anything.

“Yeah,” he said. He cupped her face in his hands and kissed her like it was the most natural thing in the world. “All the time.” 

 

#6) For that behind the scenes pic where Amanda is standing behind Rick with her hand on his shoulder? He's in a chair? Or something. This would be easier with pictures. 

 

“Ow. Stop smacking me.” Jack rubbed the back of his head. Carter had a mean smack, honed to perfection over the past year because Jack was incapable letting an opportunity to taunt her slip through his fingers. Some of it was just his nature, but sometimes he just wanted to make sure she wasn’t going to let him get away with being an ass after so many years of following his orders. 

So far, that hadn’t been much of an issue.

“If you’d sit still for more than two seconds, I wouldn’t have to.”

She was starting to sound frustrated, like she’d had enough of the posing and fake smiles for one day too. Or maybe --and this was the theory he preferred-- she really wanted to get away from Jonas because she’d gotten Jack’s text about the very important meeting he’d scheduled. They very important, and very private meeting. 

Jonas was pretending to adjust his tripod, smiling at it like it was the best fucking tripod he’d ever seen. Jack found he was better able to deal with Jonas’ eagerness and optimism now that he wasn’t spending so much emotional energy repressing the only good feelings he owned. 

Still, he didn’t understand why Jonas wanted a photo album of the SGC, or why Carter was letting him make one. It was probably Daniel’s idea. 

“This is stupid,” Jack griped. “Why does Jonas need pictures of us?”

“Why do you care? Just smile and get it over with.”

Jack pulled her down so he could talk right into her ear. Jonas could probably hear him anyway. “I’ll smile if you agree to come to my meeting, Carter.”

“God, Jack. You are such a pain in the ass.”

“Is that a yes?”

Carter kept a copy of the picture in her office, and Jack liked to look at it whenever he was at the SGC. It was a good picture. Jack was grinning like a fool who’d just gotten her to agree to meet him in the storage closet near her lab. The one where all their most interesting meetings happened. The one with the lock on the inside. The one that didn’t even have supplies in it as far as he knew.

Carter mostly looked exasperated, standing with her hand on his shoulder, ready to slap him upside the head if he didn’t hold up his end of their agreement.

Jack thought it summed up their relationship quite nicely. 

 

#7) This was for annerbhp's 10year LJ anniversary. I think I posted it like 20 years too late.

 

Sam spends the ten year anniversary of the day they met floating in front of an Ori supergate, coming to terms with the fact that the field of destruction around her will be the last thing she sees. She breathes her recycled air and tries to replace the scene in her head with something more pleasant. 

It doesn’t work. 

The trip home is long and somber. They weren’t expecting this level of defeat. They’d thrown everything they had at the Ori, and it hadn’t been enough. Not nearly. So many are dead, she doesn’t feel right expressing relief that her team is alive. She spends most of her time with Kvasir, wondering if anyone would care if she had him beam her into Jack’s apartment when they got back to Earth. It’s been too long.

They spend more time apart than together, but they’ve been making it work for the most part. He’s angry a lot, more like the man he was in the beginning. It grates on her sometimes, his moodiness. She knows where it comes from, how worried he gets. Still, she wishes he’d get over it. It’s such a poor use of their time. 

This latest battle isn’t going to help. He only knows she’s fine and on her way home. She doesn’t think anyone’s told him how close she came to dying out there. He’ll have to read about it in a report because she certainly isn’t going to tell him. The words on the page will be better. Clinical and detached. 

It’s better that way sometimes.


End file.
